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Winning!

Posted in Books, General, News on November 18, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

I know, that’s an old reference. Do you think it’s been long enough to bring it back around?

In any case, today I sold a book. Cool, huh? That makes for two novels being published in 2012! Both will be hard cover limiteds & trade paperbacks & digital, so we will be doing the mass marketing thing, getting the books out to everywhere and everyone we can. Should be good. Expect some nice promotion in the near future.

(Killer)

So, the books?

Okay. I’ve got BIRDBOX, a book in which the Garcia children inadvertently free an ancient witch whose soul has been embedded into the DNA of every bird on earth. These birds have to join with the poor soul the witch infects so that the sinister woman can manifest and take over the world. Can the kids band together and fight the evil? Not likely, you see, though they are charming and sweet, Children are pretty dumb. They make lots of grave mistakes. Fun and gruesome! (We already have a cover for this one – once Bad Moon edits, then lays it out, we’re set, but their schedule is pretty backed up).

Next up is LAMBS. This one is about some seriously screwed up teenagers. Arthur sees dead people, and phantom wounds, and may or may not be responsible for spectral murders every four years of his sixteen years on the planet. His roommate at the grouphome (after his parents died he fell into the system), Conor is crack baby with an interest in arson. Melanie is an all-American Satanist. Their lives collide in interesting, often bloody ways. It’s a bleak one, but I had some fun with making Satanists over into Norman Rockwell golly-gee-whiz types. It’s strange. And kinda cool.

So then, good news on the career front. Hopefully, you’ll enjoy them as much as I like writing them.

Covers and more news coming soon.

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Waiting Room

Posted in General, News on November 16, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

I’m off to chemo tomorrow. I also gotta get a CT, which means I have to drink this chalky stuff every few hours. Then they inject me with iodine and everything gets warm.

(Drip, drip, drip…)

I wouldn’t say I hate the hospital, but…

Well, we all have certain things we have to do. I rather enjoy spending the day with my wife. Despite all the crap, she’s there by my side to smile and pick me up. I’m a lucky guy.

My students are watching a movie so the sub can’t screw anything up.

It’s not so bad.

Good night, Loyal Reader. I’ll let you know how things go…

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These Nerds Be Syndicated!

Posted in General, Raves, Television on November 15, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

And the meek shall inherit the earth…

I am watching a scene in which two main characters have been pantsed by a Meathead. They have no choice but to walk home in their underwear. One wears boxers, the other briefs. When they get home, they fall back into their standard, meaningless, sitcom story. It’s pleasant and innocuous. I laughed aloud more than a few times. I like that it features nerds. I’ve watched it about twenty times. It’s officially my new favorite show.

It’s hard to start a new show. I have a busy DVR. Working something new into the mix is tough. Most sitcoms start bad, bad, bad. They take a while to build steam and for their central characters to gell. These 20 episodes of THE BIG BANG THEORY took a bit to sink in. I watched the first one because it was on before Conan O’Brian. Then I kept catching theme before Conan and viola! I dig it.

(Fuzzy, but true…)

I’m still fuzzy with character names (though I have heard them a thousand times, I’m usually watching while blogging or surfing). I definitely know Sheldon. Jim Parson’s super nerd – he’s ridiculous and over the top, but the character is consistent. You start to believe somebody could act that absurd and walk around without getting his ass kicked.

He does this cool, little sidelong snicker, surprising himself as he laughs, that’s weird and then funny and then viral video funny (see the video at the end of this post).

The writing for the show is outlandish and as sitcom-dumb as most every other sitcom, but a lot of the geek references are right on (never mind how I know, I just know!). Most importantly, each of the supporting cast has grown into their characters as well. They form an endearing pack of dorks.

The normal neighbor, originally there for one of the nerds (all of the nerds) to ogle over, has grown into a fully-fledged character. The Chosen Nerd even spends a season or two (I am watching these things in random blocks and sometimes I am uncertain where I am in the timeline) dating the normal chick. They’re friends now. New love interests have been added to spice things up. Another nice touch is how characters get catty, and petty, and jealous, but then end up best friends with their boyfirend’s new girlfriend and on and on…sitcom drama…

(Nerds in action – from the scene I decribed above)

It’s good stuff.

Sheldon does that laugh thing a number of times in this clip. Grammy winning stuff, Loyal Reader…

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Metal 101

Posted in General, Music, Rants on November 14, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

VH1 is running a multi-part series about Metal called, METAL: EVOLUTION. It’s put together by the same filmmaker who did METAL: A HEADBANGER’S JOURNEY (2005), Sam Dunn. The guy’s an anthropologist and he’s chosen rock/metal culture as his forte.

His first film was a nice, concise look at the different types of metal subcultures and how each segment of the genre influenced and created one another, creating more subgenres.

I learned about Saxon and Black Sabbath in the early days. Dunn’s first documentary touches on all sorts of Metal, concluding with the aggressive new metal of the time (Marilyn Manson and Slipknot type stuff, circa 2005).

(Feel the fire! Yeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaw – High kicking in skin tight spandex!)

This new show seems like a deeper chronicle, going the series route, devoting an hour to each subject. The first episode, Pre-Metal is waiting in my DVR. New episodes debut each Saturday. I highly recommend you join me. You’ll enjoy yourself, Loyal Reader, I promise. A good documentary is one of my favorite things. They are thumbs-up cool!

Anyway, my pop-culture Metal skills will be honed and I’ll be a lean, mean, trivia machine.

Rock on!

Ozzy was one cool cat…

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Don’t Bother Me! I’m Lost In Skyrim!

Posted in General, Raves on November 14, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

If you don’t know what SKYRIM is, you’re much better off.

For those of you in the know, I just killed my first dragon (well, the soldiers this dude, Jarl, sent with me killed my first dragon – one of my arrows helped, but I don’t think it was the fatal shot). I equipped my first shout (aural death-strikes I emit with my mouth!). Things are looking peachy.

One gripe – I tried to enter the college of magic but can’t cast the proper fear spell (need more magicka) to get in. Damn.

(Hit him with some fire then chop that badboy a new one!)

Aside from the central quest, I murdered a bunch of folks and stole a bunch of goods (the guards can’t stop me!).

Also, I just lost about three hours of my life.

See you in the real world, Loyal Reader. Oh, and if you happen to meet my Skyrim avatar, a mean, little Night-Elf named, Kenny Powers (woot, woot!), don’t trust ’em. He’ll knife you in the back, set your dying body aflame, and then take whatever doesn’t burn up in the fire (gold, baby, gold – jems are nice, too).

Looking good…

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Worlds Within Worlds

Posted in General, News, Raves on November 13, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

I’m 3 down, Loyal Reader. I know you aren’t trippin’, it probably takes you a while to shuffle through unread posts – there’s tons of content right?

Still, this is not an exit. Oh, no. I’m 3 down? I’ll knock out some new blogs and catch up as I can.

Here we go…

(My home away from home)

A lot has been going on. I started the weekend on Thursday night at midnight standing in line for my long-awaited copy of SKYRIM (a Nerd’s Paradise). My gem of a wife accompanied me. She seemed to enjoy the experience.

Then we got home and I played for two hours. So far so awesome.

Friday we wasted the whole day at City of Hope. BORRRING. Alas, it needs to be done.

Yesterday, Michelle and I went to Hollywood to meet some friends for Sushi and then a few more friends and then a performance of the sublime ASSSCAT, a weekly improv sketch show held at the Upright Citizen Brigade Theater. It’s a steal at 10 bucks. If you need a cocktail, don’t bother the roaming waitress who are not there, just take a pull of whatever you brown bagged in. The staff is cool with it. Just throw out your trash at the end of the show, you dirty animal.

(Don’t Think!)

Next, we kicked it with Logickal, Rex Steel, Wizwaldo, Mrs. Aero, my honey, and the coolest postman around. We had a blast and in the end, each of my tall, strong friends helped me carry my new guitar and bass amps.

We loaded up quick then hit home, late, for some DVR action and a good night’s sleep.

Right before blogging this blog, Michelle set up my music room. I tested the amps. All is well. Feast your eyes…

(My girl is magic!)

(Bringin’ da funk!)

I’ll catch up this week (2 missing threads), until then, rock on!

The Greatest Show On Earth!

Posted in General, Music, News, Raves on November 7, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

I was bummed to hear that GWAR guitarist, Cory Smoot, died a few days back. I don’t know all that much about the men behind the masks, but the guy was only 34 years old and it’s a shame he passed on. Talk about one of the coolest jobs ever.

After a few google searches, I’ve learned that Smoot wasn’t the original Flattus Maximus (the character he played in GWAR), nor will he be the last. Dave Brockie, aka Oderus Urungus, GWAR’S outspoken frontman (and original member since 1984), plans on continuing the tour in Smoot’s memory. The mask angle gives a band like GWAR the anonymity (and longevity) to swap musicians as needed.

(Super badass!)

GWAR is more known for their live shows than their song writing ability, but they have some pretty great songs. I prefer the old stuff – their fun debut HELL-O (1984), and their crowning achievement in terms of concept and musicality, SCUMDOGS OF THE UNIVERSE (1990). The two lively sets are filled with funny, sleazy rockers. They are in regular rotation on my iPod.

Of all the art-rock, punk rock, thrash bands, I’ve got floating around my hard drive, GWAR probably gets the most play.

In any case, those live shows?

Those live shows RAWK and ROLL, Loyal Reader.

I’ve seen GWAR about six times. I’ve stood apart from the action, marveling at the spectacle and I’ve been in the trenches, up to my eyeballs in sweat and food coloring.n

The best shows – the ones spent in the heat of an undulating, pushing, throbbing sea of bodies, crowd surfers above, a tornado of moshers whirling a few feet of flesh away – are near religious experiences. You thrash and dance and squeeze, while the band sprays you down with hoses (and gnarly squirt guns, and, um, phallic cannons).

(The calm before the blood soaked storm)

In the midst of all that sweat and latex and sugar sweet blood, GWAR actually rock pretty damn hard. Each time I’ve seen them they’ve gotten heavier and heavier. I like Death Metal thrash about as much as the next guy, but punk metal is more my cup of tea. Their old stuff had that vibe. Their new stuff grinds, but some of it buries melody with growling instead of singing. Still, they play their cooler songs every show. Most of them have built-in sketches. The GWAR guys seem to delight in performance art. Their shows aren’t just violent trash – the artistry is sublime.

They used to have a fire dancer (according to Wikipedia she’s since left the band) that did an awesome routine to a killer instrumental.

No matter your tastes in music, if the opportunity to go to a GWAR show presents itself you HAVE to go.

Gor-Gor!!!

2 Comments »

Emotional Twister

Posted in General, Movies, Music, News on November 3, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

Right hand Sadness. Left hand Tragic. Right foot Cold. Left foot Magic.

Then you topple to the ground in exhaustion.

Yeah, it’s been that kind of day, Loyal Reader. No school. I missed the monkeys. We’re writing a FREEDOM WRITERS essay. I think I’d have rather spent time correcting tenses and spelling things like ‘Coincidence’ or ‘Asparagus’ for four hours than going to a funeral, but we are people of respect and respect we must.

I don’t want to really get into it. He was an incredible guy. He shouldn’t have died. He had way too much to live for and it’s so sad it breaks my heart every time I think about it. Pounding it out, each keystroke jabs. My hands want to type something happy. It’s not happening. Not today.

Well…

I have to look at it the other way around. I am alive. And my family is alive. And we love our lives as much as we love each other and that is enough forever and always.

After the funeral my wife, and my kid, and I drowned our sorrows with sushi (a beef bowl for me – ~~cancer~~ won’t let me have bacteria filled raw fish) followed by some bookstore time, followed by a movie (PUSS IN BOOTS a harmlessly, hardly funny, cutesy diversion), followed by more bookstore time, then a visit to Best Buy for some new music.

Here are our five new albums…

1. Skinny Puppy – Handover
2. Rob Zombie – Icon
3. The Black Keys – Attack & Release
4. Mastadon – The Hunter
5. Kid Cudi – (I forget the title and am too lazy to go to the internet and check. Same for the other bands – you can google them if you like. Anyway, with Kid Cudi, it’s his new one.)

(I’ll give you my opinions on the albums as they come to me)

Oh, and then my wife made the most awesome pasta bake! Yum!

You know, though it never makes a lick of sense, life can be quite awesome.

Good night, Loyal Reader. Be safe and live right.

This silly movie is…meh. All of the best bits are in the much shorter trailer. Watch it instead. You’ll save 10 bucks and 89 minutes.

1 Comment »

The Letter Of Dreams To Come

Posted in General, News on November 2, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

Hey, Man!

Michelle and I want to upgrade my band room. I need some nice, garage band amps that won’t break the bank.

Can I send you a list and you can tell me what sort of deal I can get, or would you rather help select the right set up – you’ll be jamming at least twice a year also! – Halloween, and I think I’m going to start annual summer barbecue jam. Whatever happens, you gotta be a part of the inaugural class!

What I really need is two guitar amps, maybe two 2X12s? I’d like a bluesy, warm clean and then heavy, crunching, screaming distortion, but if not, I can always find a pedal that complements the clean channel enough that switching back and forth will fit perfectly. I’d like two identical guitar amps so the sound and its variable sounds are enough alike to harmonize and create some beautifully in tune music. I also need a bass amp, maybe a 15″ combo amp, or maybe 2X12s as well. Searching, I’m coming up with about 1,000 bucks worth of stuff – the amps I need are about $350 each and the bass amp is about $250 – 350, the higher end prefered.

(Vintage equipment has a great sound, but lacks the digital tricks of its contemporaries)

I’m gonna keep that ROLAND JC 120 Jazz Chorus. It’s not mine to sell (a cool friend lets me use it for as long as I like), but it’s distortion sucks and it has a weird hiss (when I googled this I learned it was how it was supposed to be. Some people actually want that hiss). In any case, it can be a powerful guitar amp, and a real mean contender with it’s deep, clear, fuzzy clean channel paired with a Metal Zone pedal capable of ripping the roof off your garage. Those 2X12s really rock!

Still, the hiss pisses me off.

I found it’s a pretty good PA. I can buy a mixer / head for it, and then run my ancient delay rack mount (which is 1000% fun) through it to clean up that hiss while giving my brand new $50 High / Low impedance mic the stones to run the show. I can finally hear the vocals clean and clear. The mic setup cranks LOTS of volume. We rocked it with most knobs turned to 4. With different effects that number varies. Sometimes you gotta turn it down even lower to avoid feedback, sometimes a delay effect might pull the sound down so low that you have to turn up to compensate. I was tempted to buy a PA and do it right, but this amp is special (it goes for 1K used on ebay! I’m lucky my buddy is so cool. I must honor him by giving it an important place in our little band (It cannot not be played!).

(Like Batman, I like my gadgets high-tech and fun. Line Six’s digital processors offer all sorts of killer sounds! Spice up a solo with some wah and flange and a slight delay – fun!)

Any way, I want to upgrade those three amps and want to do it soon. Maybe we can visit and shop – when you get off work, we’ll eat and then see some UCB.

Between new toys, good friendship, and watching good comedy, I can’t think of a finer night out.

Oh, by the way, this is going up on my blog as a daily post entitled, The Letter Of Dreams To Come. I like to keep a Day In My Everyday Life vibe ’round here. My Loyal Readers like letters and gossip and digging in the dirt. Though, while editing I’ve come to notice that we are boring and pretty gossip free. We like to make fun of folks sometimes (off camera please), but without that Rex Steel causing beef, you’d almost be germ free.

(Click the pic and get in the know. Listen, learn. Rex will be appearing in my rock – rap – festival-on-fire opus, HYPNOTIC. Spittin’ rhymes, cappin’ on fools, swaggering his way through the crowd, when the guns come out Rex is ready to bust a few of these mutant blood freaks’ headz!)

Okay then, what do you think? E-mail me back so we can get this musical transaction underway. Then we need a plan to break it all in…

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(Let’s Go) Walkin’ In The Cold November Rain

Posted in General, Music, Raves on November 1, 2011 by Michael Louis Calvillo

“Everybody needs some time, on their own…”

Damn, Axle Rose was really on his way, huh? In the short time that he and his seminal hard rock band, GUNS ‘N’ ROSES, held it together, he managed to craft a handful of great songs. The aforementioned, November Rain, Patience, Don’t Cry, Sweet Child O’ Mine, and few above average rockers – It’s So Easy, Paradise City – register as classics. They’ll stay relevant forever. You can’t go wrong with good old rock and roll. The sound is somewhat timeless.

(We hate you almost as much as we hate each other.)

But then eccentricities went and sank the band. I figured Rose would emerge as an important solo artist (whatever name he performed under). I figured he’d keep writing and produce some gems in the process. As evidenced by his output, he was really coming into his own with the rock-opera-ballad type stuff. The fire of youth was giving way to some genuinely accomplished songwriting. That he had (still has?) an entire hell of personal demons only helped. Broken love songs eat happy love songs for a midnight snack.

I read Slash’s tell-all (appropriately titled SLASH) over the summer. The guitar virtuoso spent very few pages on Axle, but the little he wrote isn’t pretty. The frontman comes off as moody, withdrawn, excessive, selfish, and very, very high maintainance.

Anyway, this wasn’t supposed to be a post about Axel Rose, Loyal Reader. I just stole one of his song titles to set the mood for this blog. What I really wanted to write about was the turning of the seasons.

(Get over your Blair Witch phobias and enjoy a nice walk in the woods.)

Unfortunately, it’s gone now. The great things I was going to get out have died and disappeared and now I’m whistling (badly) Patience and trying to bring it back. It’s not coming…

Hmmm. What I wanted to say, in an extremely condensed nutshell – is that I love the fall. I love the cool weather and the crisp air. I love pumpkin spice candles and then pine cones and then the New Year’s mix of smoke, champagne, and holiday treats.

Great songwriters have the power to invoke a feeling that invokes memory that fills us with nostalgia. Something like November Rain and my personal favorite, Patience, do just that. They move me much in the same way Billy Corgan’s version of Stevie Nick’s Landslide does.

(Take a quick blog break and get all nostalgic – this song almost makes me wanna cry...)

I know this emotional recall and the power of sentimental songwriting is different for everyone, my selections are not your selections, but whoever you are, it works. Right? It’s a shame Rose went off the deep end at the height of his power. He probably had (still has) a few stunners in him.

So then, there’s a song out there that triggers the floodgates and gets those memories percolating. When the moment strikes, get comfortable, close your eyes, and take the trip – your soul will thank you for it.

If we’re on the same wavelength, well, here you go…